So I was thinking about the new product introduction, "Blonde" coffee, from our favorite national chain, and something just didn't fit. So I went off to my online dictionary to find out exactly what the word meant.
I found two definitions that seem like they could be applied to coffee: 1. Of a flaxen or golden color; and, 2. Light-colored through bleaching.
I will admit that I haven’t been down to their store in our town to buy a bag and see what’s inside, but in my experience, the only time coffee is “of a flaxen or golden color” is when it is not very far into the roast, as in not ready to drink.
But they are a lot bigger than me, so maybe they know something I don’t.
Then there is the possibility of bleaching, I suppose. But gosh, who would do that to coffee?
So since the dictionary doesn’t lie, and since all advertising is true, I figured that somehow the wizards over there must be doing something to turn the coffee a flaxen or golden color. So here is my artist’s rendering of what the stuff must look like.
Nah. No one would buy yellow coffee, would they?